Work in Progress: Raising health-conscious children



When my daughter was born, I made it a part of my mission to really prepare myself to cook delicious and healthy vegan meals for her and now, for my son too. It is important to me that my children love to eat at home and as a family. I often envision my house being a haven for wonderful international cuisine, fresh baked vegan desserts, fresh juices and smoothies, herbal teas, healthy and fun snacks, fruits and veggies taken from my own garden; I fantasize about the kitchen being the heart and soul of our home.

I have been vegetarian for about 8 years now and I have recently recommitted myself to also being dairy-free. I am raising my children to also be meat and dairy-free; it was a decision I made very consciously and I am extremely excited about it. And while I am blessed to be surrounded by a community of mostly vegetarians, outside of it, I often get asked about the choice to live on such a "strict" diet and raising my babies to do the same.

Many times when I say to someone that I am a strict vegetarian, the question I get asked the most is, "What do you eat?!" The funny thing is that it is usually asked with this notion that there isn't anything left. I try to maintain the principle that possibilities are limitless in all aspects of my life, including food and food preparation. So, while I have eliminated many things that I deem unhealthy for myself and my children from our diets, I am that much more motivated to expand my own experience of vegan cooking and to make it a part of our family tradition.

Eating for most people, including myself, is about the pleasure that is recieved from eating certain foods. I know that many people struggle with eating healthy because, "healthy foods" are usually associated with being bland, boring, and unappetizing. I was very fortunate to transition to a vegetarian lifestyle in Tallahassee, amongst a community of vegetarians and vegetarian restaurants that made the most delicious foods. I felt like I had truly experienced the beauty and pure goodness of food for the first time there. I have always had a love for food but, now that I am vegetarian, that love has magnified.

Because of my experience, part of my mission is to somewhat disspell the myth that vegetarians and vegans only eat nuts and berries and take no part in actually enjoying the taste of food. I believe that while the primary goal should be to invest our time and energy into engaging healthy eating habits, I also believe that it can be done in a way that is enjoyable and pleasing to the soul.

I was inspired to write this blog after I watched Oprah's special on veganism. She and 378 of her staff members went vegan for a week. I thought this was an extremely powerful show for several reasons. One, veganism is seen as this extreme lifestyle and it was great that Oprah made it something that was approachable and easier than one might presume. Two, although the show was about veganism, they were more concerned with promoting the idea of health awareness, which I am a strong advocate for. I loved that they talked in depth about getting educated on what you are eating. And three, I know that when Oprah introduces an idea on her show, many people are inspired to change, worldwide. I knew that people all over would be motivated to either take the 7-day vegan challenge or be inspired to change something about their diets or lifestyle.

I don't believe that veganism is a lifestyle for everyone. But, as a mother, I am more concerned with perpetuating the idea that we have to be committed to teaching our children healthy eating habits. Investing in our health and our children's health takes awareness, work, sacrifice, committment, and discipline. I am met with challenges with raising my daughter to be meat and dairy-free already. At home, it is easier to control what she eats. But, when we are at birthday parties, holiday gatherings, or with my family or friends that don't subscribe to the same diet, it can be a bit challenging. It is easier to feed children things that are convenient, accessible, cheaper, and that appear to be more fun and pleasurable but, in the end it could be doing them a disservice. So, even with the challenges, I continue to push forward.

Where there are challenges, there are also benefits that make it worthwhile. My daughter isn't quite 2 and I already see amazing rewards. Anyone who knows my daughter can vouch for how much she loves food. And that is really an understatement! I know that many children are picky eaters, which can present a challenge that I myself haven't dealt with but, I do think that simplifying children's diets early on and introducing them to a host of fruits and vegetables, can be the start of a wonderful foundation.

My daughter eats cooked vegetables of all kinds, some live vegetables, fresh juices, herbal teas (that are safe for babies); she'll even drink tea with garlic in it, like a champ! And she absolutely loves smoothies. I think that I did get a child that just really loves food but, I think that it is also the level of exposure. From what I have seen, many children are only introduced to a few vegetables and fruits and are given junk food more often (including sweets, fast foods, and processed foods), which is a detriment to getting them comfortable with the taste of healthier foods. Especially since in this society, healthy foods are often swallowed up by the promotion of more "kid-friendly" foods, which usually have far less nutritional value.

And that's where my passion and committment comes in. While I do want my children to have a healthy and strong foundation, I also want them to have fun with their food and enjoy it. I know that there is a way to do both and I am currently experiencing it daily. I subscribe to vegan blogs, I research delicious recipes, and I make traditional recipes into vegan friendly ones. And the more I find, the more I realize that being vegan is not as daunting as it is presented. I have found a vegan substitute for just about every favorite meal or dessert that I have and have opened myself to a new wealth of knowledge.

Being committed to a life of conscious and healthy eating helps us, our children, and it can do wonders for the environment. I do think that cutting back on meat, dairy, and processed foods, is a necessity in this country for several reasons but, ultimately it is a personal choice. I am just here to promote the idea that our personal choices should be made with awareness and if we are continually presented with information about concerns with our food consumption, we have to make responsible choices, especially for our children and their well-being. It is a constant work in progress but, the road to a healthy life, can be so much sweeter than you can imagine!

Stay tuned for much more on this topic...

Interested in learning about vegan cooking, check out these websites:

Vegan Blogs I Enjoy:

FatFree Vegan Kitchen: Sinlessly Delicious- http://blog.fatfreevegan.com/

Naturi Beauty Blog: http://naturibeauty.com/blog/ (this blog is a wonderful resource for cooking both vegan and non-vegan foods, as well as other goodies, such as all natural beauty recipes)

Mommy's Minute: The honesty policy

Tea time: One of my favorite ways to "get away."

I am always amazed when my children know exactly what I need and I am so appreciative for their understanding and patience. And sometimes they need my understanding, and today was one of those days. I woke up feeling awful; I have been fighting sickness for the past couple weeks but, today it got worse. I had to put it all aside because, both babies seemed to require much more attention today. My sun was particularly fussy, I know it is because I've had to breast feed him from one breast while the other one healed from a wound I have (no one tells you how breast feeding changes when your baby gets teeth). And my daughter was just full of energy and wanted me by her side. Needless to say, all I wanted was to curl up in bed and rest.

Now that they are both tucked into bed, the weight of the day has fallen on my shoulders. And while I would've loved to go and rest, I needed to make preparations for tomorrow, while I had some time to myself. I was also reflecting on the day; I kept feeling like I was going to run out of steam but somehow, the energy just kept coming (thankfully). I feel like that many days, which has led me to making more of a commitment for some "me time." Even though I know I am a strong person and that will power is real, I also know that running on empty is not a healthy way to live.

When it comes to being a mom, I can honestly say that I am an "overachiever." I do believe that being ambitious is needed in the times that we live but, I realize that everyone needs time to reengergize and regroup. I can be a bit unrealistic on how much I can handle in a day, even though my intentions are always good. I remember a few weeks back, I left an update on my facebook status saying that while I love to talk about all the great things I experience with my babies, I was really looking forward to a break from them. That was a very hard thing for me to say out loud and I shared that too in my update. A wise woman commented and her words stick with me. She said, "Needing a break doesn't make you a bad mommy, it makes you human."

I thought about that tonight and her words inspired this entry. I wanted to say out loud to other mothers and people who constantly give of themselves, and may be struggling with that same feeling, that it is okay to be honest with where you are. You are only enhancing yourself by turning inward and listening to your feelings and adhering to your own needs. I let so much time go by without ever checking in with myself and setting aside time for me. It is not healthy and in the end, you are doing yourself a disservice.


Taking a week long vacation or even taking an entire weekend is a lofty goal, at least for me. So my little motto is "take advantage of the ordinary." I think its a very healthy idea to try to find a few moments to yourself everyday. The more the merrier of course but, for me I have to start small. So, this is my moment. Writing is very relaxing and carthartic for me. And once I am finished here, I will have a cup of hot green tea, which also calms me. It may seem simple or mundane, but I can put my all into the moment and come out feeling renewed. It is a work in progress to be completely present and to make the time completely about my needs but, it must be considered a priority daily.

The lesson here is to commit to an honesty policy with yourself. I have feelings of guilt and disappointment that may arise when I am honest but, I remind myself of those wise words. And the better I take care of myself the better equipped I am to handle all that life and my babies bring.

This was on my heart to share and I hope that these words bring comfort and reassurance to those who may need to hear it.

Motherhood: Breaking down barriers

I've been working really hard at training myself to braid my daughter's hair. And while it has proven to be quite an enjoyable experience, I look back on when I was younger and I swore that if I ever had a girl, someone else would be in charge of maintaining her hair. I wasn't very good with caring for my own hair growing up and even at present, I find it somewhat difficult to find the time. I admired people who could braid and thought it was intriguing but, I never even considered the possibility that I could ever braid anyone's hair. So yesterday, when my dear friend who happenes to be an awesome hair stylist, complimented me on my daughter's braids, I was beaming with joy. She also recognized how hard I work to prepare myself for when my children get older.

It is easy to think that who you are or what you can do, are very static things but, when a journey like motherhood comes along, it can help break down these types of illusive barriers. I would look at people braiding hair and it always seemed so foreign to me. Now, I feel extremely comfortable with it and I am very happy to share the experience with my daughter. Actually learning how to braid was quite instantaneous, once I actually decided I would try. The work began in actually developing the skills and opening up creatively, in that regard.

Self-imposed limitations are a detriment to attaining personal freedom, in my opinion. I can't believe how many things I wrote off before even giving myself a chance to entertain the idea that I could do them. Since allowing myself the room to explore, I have grown tremendously in so many areas I never imagined before. And while I am very thoughtful in my preparations and work as a mother, I continually inspire myself to try more, especially when I see barriers being torn down in my life. Because of my willingness to learn, I am more fulfilled and I don't feel trapped by percieved limitations. And most importantly, I have more to offer my children.

Something as "simple" as braiding my daughter's hair has truly amounted to an eye-opening experience. My points of reflection are to think about things you've written off as impossible for you to do or experience. What would it take for you to become open to exploring those things? What do you think caused the barrier (s)?

Let's break down those barriers to experience more fulfillment and personal freedom.



POSSIBILITY.

Motherhood: Living in gratitude

Gratitude....the word alone invokes this feeling within me; an utter appreciation that lingers in every fiber of my being. Since having my children, I have become deeply aware of just how beautiful and sacred life is. Having been through times where my resources were very limited, "living in gratitude" became one of the greatest lessons for my life. And in confronting feelings of hopelessness when I lost my father, all I had left to cling to, was gratitude. In the midst of sadness, violence, inhumanity, oppression, and my own personal difficulties; I have found that living in gratitude is a shining beacon that connects me back to goodness and peace. And I teach this principle of life to my babies.
                                                    

                                                   

( Asase Ye Duru, "the earth has weight"~ symbolizes the divinity of Mother Earth; it  represents the importance of sustaining Mother Earth).

A very significant part of living in gratitude, for me, is to honor the "mother principle" that exists in all aspects of life. When I began to walk my path, as a mother, it was a natural progression for me to become more aware of the Earth and how she continues to sustain (mother) us; despite our wayward disconnection and mass consumption of her resources. Now, I am constantly giving thanks for everything that is from the Earth, I am conscious of how I use resources that I am blessed to have, and I take the time to just enjoy her boundless splendor with my children.

I became much more understanding and grateful for my own mother, on this journey. Sharing the road of motherhood with my mom is such a beautiful and healing experience. I was able to let go of old "stuff" and I am better able to just enjoy my mother as she is. Her support and love is unending and to her, I am forever grateful.

Living in gratitude is also about honoring the mothers who came before me. As I labored with my daughter at home, I felt this intrinsic connection to my foremothers. I called upon the names I knew and honored the ones who remain nameless. I had the strength to carry on because, I knew many of my ancestors gave birth to their children with bravery, in the midst of great suffering. When I find that I feel weakened by a moment of difficulty, I think about those mothers of slavery, the mothers of the civil rights movement, and the mothers of past, whose spirits beamed brightly, despite the intended oppression of their authenticity, as human beings, women, and mothers.

These are just some of the ways I experience and express my gratitude, in regards to honoring the mothers in my life. As I continue to uncover my purpose as a mother, I am learning from all the wisdom and guidance that is all around me. It is a priviledge to be a part of such a sacred and powerful circle.

A point of reflection: How do you experience/express your gratitude for the mothers in your life?

Mommy Adventures: The baby food dilemma

So, let me get right into it. I don't know what to do about my "sun,"as I call him. He won't eat anything I give him! I have been breast feeding him exclusively since he was born. And since I am home with him, I didn't bother with bottles. He did have a bottle once when he was a newborn and he took it very easily. A couple months ago, when he was going on an outing with some of my extended family, I sent bottles with them, thinking that he would take them like a champ. He was 7-months old by that time but, I thought he would take them with ease, just like he did as a newborn. My sun is a very big baby so (naively), I figured he wouldn't care what "container" his food came in. I couldn't have been more wrong. He had settled on dismissing the bottles and he waited to get home to his all natural food supply.

That was a wake up call for me and I knew I needed to get him adjusted to taking a bottle. I started trying to give him a bottle at least once a day. He wouldn't budge. Between trying to potty train my daughter and bottle train my sun, I was exhausted. Both of them are extremely strong-willed and didn't want to participate in either process. My daughter was very helpful with trying to get her brother to drink from a bottle, but both of us were met with resistance. I temporarily gave up.

A few weeks ago, the process became even more challenging when he was going on another outing. I talked to his pediatrician about it and she told me that someone else would probably need to give it to him. In the midst of trying to prepare him for his day, my manual pump broke (after only a few uses). So, I had to get a quick plan B. I decided to get some soy formula from the health food store. I am not a real fan of formula (although I had to use it with my daughter; that's another story) but, I found one that had only a few ingredients. He still wasn't taking a bottle but, I figured my friend could try to give it to him while I wasn't around.

He was uncompromising. By this time, I had also tried giving him brown rice cereal. He would eat a couple spoonfuls with me but, that was it. When he was out, he ate a couple bowls! That gave me the idea that I should start trying more solid foods.

Since that time, I have tried brown rice cereal, cornmeal porridge, carrots (which he ate in the beginning but, now wants no parts of), sweet potatoes, peas, and bananas. I've tried to warm the baby food and I have given it to him at room temperature. I've tried sticking with one vegetable for the week to get him adjusted, that doesn't help. I've tried both jar food and homemade. He won't even acknowledge it most times. If I do manage to get some in his mouth, he looks like he is disgusted and starts swatting at the spoon to prevent any other sneak attacks. Did I mention that he is the strongest almost 9- month old on the planet? The only thing as of late that he successfully ate for me were prunes! He ate the smallest jar over the course of two days.

My sun is a "bubs" baby. He doesn't need anything else in the world but his milk. He savors every moment and rarely wants to part with them. And while it has been a beautiful experience, I need the flexibility of having other options. My life is getting busier and my babies are beginning to spend time in others' care more often. He doesn't seem to have the same problem with eating baby food with others but, he won't entertain the bottle or sippy cup (I forgot to mention I've tried that too). And it would be nice to have my body back, just a little. I still want to continue breast feeding, but I'd like for him to have other sources for his food intake too.

This experience has been so different than my daughter. As I said before, I had to give up (sadly) trying to breast feed her because she never latched on properly. Every transition she made in the process of getting her to eat was much smoother. And now, she can't stop eating! But, my dear sun has taken on a different approach, and I am all out of ideas.

I am turning this one to you Mamas and/or Papas, what do you suggest I do??